happy.

Have you ever wondered what it would be like to be happy?  Not just the like I'm having a great day and I'm really happy right now, but the I am truly happy with my life.  I look at these people I am friends with on Facebook and some of them, I have to admit, I am jealous of.  They look so happy.  And I could be wrong they could be completely miserable, I don't know for sure, but I do know that when I look at them and see them taking pictures of fun stuff or there happy boyfriends I just think, man why am I not that happy?  I really like my self don't get me wrong.  As weird as this may sound I am kind of my own role model.  And I am happy per say I just wish I was....... better.  And I am completely aware that this is something I need to work on myself and of course I am doing that everyday, and I am sure that one day I will be able to look at my life completely, the way I look, the friends I have, the boyfriend I have (hopefully), the job I have and just think I am completely happy.  Even if its just for a little while I want nothing more then to be able to do that.  And that is what I am working to.  That is my biggest life goal.  But I just look at these people and I'm jealous because they got there before me.  One day I will able to look at everything around me and know that I worked hard for it and I will be so happy.  But for right know I am just trying to get there and in the mean time I will just be wondering what would it be like to be happy?